ஆப்ஸ்

இந்த சாப்ட்வேர்காரங்க operations department-டை செல்லமாக ஆப்ஸ், ஆப்ஸ் (Ops) அப்படின்னு கூப்படுவாங்க - இன்னிக்கு தான் வெளங்கிச்சு - ஆப்ஸ் அப்படின்னா operations-க்கு short form கிடையாது. In fact, அது ஒரு தமிழ் வார்த்தை தான்.

ஆப்ஸ் அப்படின்னா ஆப்பு வெக்கரவங்கன்னு அர்த்தம்.

எங்கு திரும்பினாலும் அதே புலம்பல்

"இந்த கம்ப்யூட்டர் line-க்கு வரவே கூடாது ... ரொம்ப தப்பு"

இருட்டில் முகம் தெரியாத யாரோவொருவர் mobile-லில் புலம்பிக்கொண்டிருந்தார்.

தூ, டீ கடையாடா இது ?

Tea Room Etiquette of 'The Tea Cosy', Brighton

Mobile phones must not be used in the main tearoom under any circumstances.

சரி, ந்யாயமான கோரிக்கை ...

The un-savoury habit of dunking biscuits’ is strictly prohibited and will result in you being ask to leave the tea rooms.

என்னது பொறைய முக்க கூடாதா ?

There is a correct way to hold your cup and saucer. Pick up your cup and saucer together-holding the saucer in one hand and the cup in the other. The best way to hold a tea cup is to slip your index finger through the handle, up to almost the first knuckle, then balance and secure the cup by placing your thumb on the top of the handle and allowing the bottom of the handle to rest on your middle finger. Hold the cup lightly, by the handle- your pinkie doesn’t have to be extended (contrary to popular belief, the ring and the pinkie finger should not be extended, but should rest by curving gently back towards your wrist). Hold the saucer under your cup while you sip your tea (least you should spill or dribble).

Nation of Snobs-ன்னு எப்படி பெயர் வந்துச்சுன்னு இப்பதான்டா புரியுது

When stirring your tea, kindly refrain from clinking the sides of your cup.

வெரல விட சொல்றீங்களா ?
...

Blasphemy Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth, Julie Goodyear MBE, Princess Diana, Jane Mc Donald, or any member of the royal family is strictly prohibited and again will result in you being asked to leave the rooms.


டேய், எங்க ஊருல அரசியல் வாதிகள், ராஜா, ராணி, நடிகர், நடிகைகளையெல்லாம் criticise பண்ணாட்டி டீ கடைய விட்டு எழுந்து போக வேண்டி வரும்

Guests are invited to adopt correct posture and avoid from resting elbows on our tables.

கால எப்படிடா கீழ வெக்க முடியும் ? பெஞ்ச் கீழ தான் நாய் படுதுருக்கும்ல ..

Conversation should never be louder than two tones above the chink of a tea cup and
Good table manners are expected at all times.

As display of respect, guests in residents at the stroke of 4pm on Sundays are required to rise for The National Anthem, followed by three cheers for Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth. Un-cooperative guests will be promptly issued with their bill and escorted from the premises. (Disabled and infirm exempt).

டேய், இப்பதான்டா புரியுது, அந்த மனுஷன மகாத்மான்னு ஏன் கூப்படராங்கன்னு ...

Not Everyone Can Be Beautiful, But They Should Try

Beauty queens are encouraged to think of themselves as role models so it was easy to ask Manisha what she would do when she was one. What would she advise people who were short or dark? Very seriously she replied, “Not everyone can be beautiful but they should try.” Manisha clearly equated short and dark with ugliness. We waited to see if she will qualify this line of thought. She didn’t.

- One of the girls (Manisha is not her real name) shortlisted for the Lucknow round of Miss India 200

Bollywood Awards are a Joke

These awards are a joke and anyone who takes them seriously needs to have his head examined. Which in turn means that a lot of our film industry needs to get their heads examined. But for some reason, people feel happy when they win them. I suppose it is the appreciation that they receive. Also, they like to get together and pat each other's back, praise each other, give each other awards. They make sure that everybody is pleased, everybody is satisfied. In ten years' time, there will be another award called Best Actor in the role of a Cruel Aunty and there will be another award called Best Actor in the role of a Crooked Cop and so on - there are going to be like 200 awards. Because everybody has to be pleased you see.

- Naseeruddin Shah

ஏரியா குமார்

இடம்: A beach in south Chennai.

I noticed him pushing the தள்ளு வண்டி rather erratically while arguing with two women. Galeej, ,drunk, women shouting at him and predictably enough he ran his tricycle into the side of a parked car. A man got out to inspect the damage; a woman got out after a few seconds and started with "என்னங்க நாங்க ஓரமா நிறுத்தி இருக்கோம், நீங்க வாட்டுல வந்து மோதறீங்க " and the ladies who were accompanying him joined the chorus , although it was not immediately clear whose side they were on. Area Kumar cut short the ladies thusly:

பொம்பளைங்கெல்லாம் வாய மூடுங்க !

என்னை கொடுமை சார், இது ?

Comical yes, but comic book hero ? சுத்தமா முடியல ... our childhood fantasies like castles built in the beach sand get washed away, but for them to get pissed out of existence like this ... take a look at the sample of the pantheon, it's blasphemous to even suggest he deserves to be in it. This is not the first time this is happening, but does mark a new low.

'High' College-House Kaapi

I was talking to two fairly conservative பெருசுகள் - there seemed to be general agreement that filter kaapi standards in Chennai were pretty bad; I was very happy to hear them blame the water quality, since this tallies with a pet theory of mine.

One of the mamas slipped into a flashback mode - நான் மதுரைல படிக்கும் போது daily college house'ல காப்பி குடிப்போம். ரொம்ப நல்லா இருக்கும். அப்படியே ஒரு addiction மாதிரி . அந்த காப்பில அவன் அப்ப்டியே கொஞ்சம் அபின் கலந்துருவான் - ஒரு சிட்டிகை தான். அந்த காப்பிய விடவே முடியாது

I rudely interrupted the college house days nostalgia fest that followed by pointing out that college house had gone to dogs and had changed hands.

Then the topic drifted to medical use of drugs. முன்னெல்லாம் medical use'காக உப்யோகபடுத்துவாங்க, now they have unnecessarily made it a taboo. அந்த காலத்துல எல்லாம் கொஞ்சூண்டு கொடுப்பாங்க - நல்ல relief கிடைக்கும். பாரதியார் கூட ...

You can guess how the rest of the thread went.

யாராவது இந்த காலேஜ் ஹௌஸ் காப்பி கலப்பட விவகாரம் பத்தி விஷயம் தெரிஞ்சவர்கள் , preferrably பெரியவங்க இருந்தா கேட்டு சொல்லுங்கப்பா.

Heart Popping North Indian Sweets

A couple of years back, I remember reading that Ratna Cafe had passed to North Indian hands. I stopped for a quick bite yesterday while passing through திருவல்லிக்கேணி. There is a counter selling North Indian sweets up front. One of the sweets appropriately enough is called 'Dil Bahar' - அதாவது there is so much ghee/dalda in it that your heart will explode. உள்ள healthy இட்லி, வெளியில் North Indian Junk Food ... Intel Inside, Idiot Outside as some Linux fans once observed of their enemy.

P.S. Not a Ratna Cafe fan, but couldn't let this opportunity pass ...

P.P.S. Right to misinterpret/twist வட இந்தியன் சொற்கள் reserved.